As developing rolefulness requires an understanding of one’s values, a strong sense of self, and clarity in one’s relationships with others, practicing introspection is highly beneficial. This may not be new advice for you, but how can you implement it?
Every spiritual and religious tradition encourages self-reflection. However, many lack a concrete methodology for doing so. Daiki and I would like to introduce one: Naikan Journaling.
Naikan Journaling
Naikan is a structured self-reflection technique. Nai means ‘inside,’ and kan means ‘looking’; therefore, Naikan translates to ‘inside looking’ or ‘introspection.’ The technique can be described as the Japanese art of self-reflection, of seeing oneself with the mind's eye.
There are two types of Naikan: one-week and daily. The former is conducted continuously for a week or more at a Naikan training center or at the home of a Naikan practitioner, where clients spend most of the day reflecting on their relationships in silence. Daily Naikan can be a self-managed reflective journaling practice incorporated into one’s routine.
Grounded in Pure Land Buddhist tradition, it offers a clear, usable method for practicing gratitude and serves as both a spiritual and psychotherapeutic practice.
Naikan helps increase awareness of the compassion others show us, often unnoticed, and the innate self-centeredness of human nature. During Naikan journaling, individuals reflect on their interactions with family members or others, asking themselves three key questions.
The Three Naikan Self-Reflection Questions
- What did this person give to me?
- What did I return to this person?
- What troubles did I cause this person?
Daily Naikan
Daily Naikan can take just a few minutes or a few hours and focuses on recent events (within the last 24 hours). It involves sitting quietly and listing answers to the three questions in relation to the day's events. Unlike one-week Naikan, daily practice is more flexible and can explore interactions with various people by slightly rewording the questions.
The Three Naikan Self-Reflection Questions
- What did this others give to me?
- What did I return to others?
- What troubles did I cause others?
As you can see, this is a simple framework. These questions are easy to understand and apply in your reflective practice.
Daiki shares that the second question, “What did I return to this person?” has a strong connection with rolefulness. In the Naikan method, reflecting on your relationships with important people is essential. What we give back to others relates directly to our social roles.
In our daily lives, others often do things for us, and we typically should reciprocate. However, it is difficult to focus on our relationships objectively in today’s VUCA world—characterized by volatility, uncertainty, complexity, and ambiguity. The Naikan questions help us reflect and refocus our attention on our social roles.